We're Back! But Is Our Bandwidth?

Have you ever found yourself caught between the exhilarating highs of joy and the devastating lows of grief? That's the emotional landscape we navigate in our Season 3 premiere as we share both the heartwarming anticipation of our new baby, conceived on a birthday that will forever be cherished, and the deep sorrow of losing a twin sibling earlier this year. We're opening up about the roller coaster of emotions that have accompanied us over the past months, and how the unwavering support from Samuel and our incredible community has been our anchor through it all. Join us as we discuss what it means to pause, regroup, and come back with a mission renewed, ready to embrace the challenges and triumphs of podcasting and parenting alike.

Our conversation digs into the realities of moving to a new place with a newborn, illustrating the balance of creating new memories while bidding farewell to the familiar. As we step into new roles within our family, we explore the importance of personal bandwidth, the wisdom of knowing our limits, and the spiritual grounding needed to stay true to ourselves and our relationships. We challenge ourselves and our listeners to reflect on their own boundaries, finding the courage to rest when needed and the inspiration to pursue personal growth. So, tune in for a thought-provoking discussion that promises authenticity, warmth, and practical insights into making life's transitions a bit more manageable.

Transcript

Life Updates and Community Love

Speaker 2 0:00

we back we are back, we back mm-hmm cannot talk in my shift.

Speaker 2 0:06

Podcast lashawn g walker samuel walker season three yeah episode one episode one this is gonna be a uh life update episode, but just for those who are new to the pod, welcome. We want to thank you for joining us. Be sure to subscribe to the podcast. You know, go ahead and make sure you rate the podcast. Let us know you love it by giving it five stars and review it so that we know what to continuously bring to you. We are a podcast that promotes community. We promote wellness and healing. We promote personal accountability. We advocate for loving healthy relationships.

Speaker 1 1:04

We support you in light out life after loss we do all of those things and, on top of that, we make sure that we bring the love. We bring the love, man, and you know what? What's crazy. Firstly, I want to thank whoever is here listening to our podcast. Like I said, or like wifey said, this episode, three season, one episode season three season three, episode one, you know the rigidness around podcasting.

Speaker 1 1:39

I believe that I myself personally got caught up in that and I'm noticing that there's this trend where you know, with a podcast you are supposed to learn something, you're supposed to grow in some kind of way, some helpful tips on how to get something done in your life that maybe you're having challenges with, or it's just an entertainment podcast, or you got the mystery pack.

Speaker 1 2:03

You know so many different categories now that are out here and I think me personally I was so focused on trying to be different where that created the inconsistency of us recording to all of our avid listeners and fans out there.

Speaker 1 2:29

For that reason, because it created an insurmountable amount of stress and pressure on us to be great on these microphones when really we already that, and I think that the title in itself allows people to come in with their guard down, have an open mind and an open heart for what we have to say Because, truth be told, we just love our community, we love our people and I'm learning as we go along that we really do have a huge heart center for building a community and just diving into changes all around in life. Yo, holistic health where we want to live at what the American dream really is versus what it was taught to us as just all these different things you know that we want to question, and I know there's people out there who feel the same way and I know there's people out there who feel the same way.

Speaker 2 3:28

Yeah, we're not trying to reinvent the wheel, you know we but we do want to be able to express ourselves on this particular platform in a way that is helpful, impactful, real, authentic and something that will give you listener, as the listener, something to chew on after you've listened. You know we don't want to keep you here all day, but we want to give you something to some food for thought I want to keep you all day long.

Speaker 1 3:59

I want you here. You feel me like you in the room, I don't know. Know, I want to keep you here yeah, I don't know.

Speaker 2 4:06

People still got to get to the bag. I don't know what she's talking about. I'm trying to keep you here.

Speaker 1 4:10

I'm trying to be in your ear while you get into the month like a bag. I'm gonna be in your ear while you get into the bag, while you counting your coins, while you checking your bank account. I'm being your earlobe. You heard like that's how it's gonna be.

Speaker 2 4:27

I don't know what they talking about well, while we have you in this episode episode one, season three we are going to just give you just a little life update. Um, if you feel the need and the spirit moves, you go back to season two, go back to season one, check out a lot of what we're talking about and then, um, we'll get up to. It'll get you up to speed to where we are now. Um, ending season two, we had some news that we were going to share and then we had just life happen. So, after the last episode that we published last year, we were going to into the next holiday, which we learned, I guess maybe a couple weeks later, that we were going to be expecting a little one.

Speaker 1 5:25

Yeah, we conceived on my birthday. Yeah, go figure 11-11.

Speaker 2 5:31

And now our little boop is here, almost four months old. She will be four months old next week, on the 5th, and so we had that happen. We learned that, and the same day that we learned that, we learned that my brother was ill. My twin brother was ill and was in the hospital or, actually, we didn't learn that until later in the week, but I won't get all into it but the same day we found out in retrospect, the same day we found out we were pregnant was the same day that my twin brother went into the hospital and, um, unfortunately, he wasn't able to sustain life, um, on the medicine that he was. He was being administered and he transitioned on January 6th.

Speaker 2 6:28

So the beginning, the end of 2023 and the beginning of 2024, was pretty tough. But if you want to talk about support, man, uh, you will. You will fully understand why we weren't able to come back into the pod space for a while, because Samuel was the biggest, biggest, biggest support during that time, um, so you're looking at loss, but you're also looking at um firstester things, and he really, really held me up during that time. We actually spent about three weeks in Virginia that's where we are originally from both of us and we just were there with family and taking care of business. Throughout that time, you know, we got a lot of support, people leaning in, showing us love, and when we came back home it was right back to work yeah, right back to the grind with a different attitude.

Speaker 1 7:47

You know, um, I want to say thank you for thank you for allowing me to assist you at that time, because we need to unpack that a little bit if we're catching people up to what's been going on and where we've been at.

Speaker 1 8:07

You know, death is a is a double-edged sword.

Speaker 1 8:13

Excuse me, because when you are caught up in the rigidness and that's gonna be a new word all 2025 that I'm going to be using the rigidness of an idea, a philosophy, a religion, a belief, when someone that you love comes with something that challenges that said belief or idea or religion, and you tend to, or you start to have, uh, clarity with the thing that is challenging your current belief, all while being emotionally distraught.

Speaker 1 8:58

It can be, it can be very tough, extremely intense, and something feels like it's insurmountable in a way Right, and at the same time, you're you're unlearning and you're learning something new. You're peeling back layers, you're trying to exist in a place like it's the norm, but there is a new norm that's happening and you have to allow space for that to occur. And so you know my wife she was able to navigate through all of that and currently is still navigating through all of that each and every day, and I'm grateful that you allow me to assist you and I'm saying assist you and not guide you, because that's all I could do at that time.

Speaker 2 9:52

Yeah.

Speaker 1 9:53

All I could do was assist you and allow you the space to sift through, figure out what needed to stay and what didn't emotionally, spiritually, right, navigate through your own um, negativity, positivity, all of those things and just be an anchor and a reminder of who you are.

Speaker 2 10:24

Yeah.

Speaker 1 10:25

And I think that you know, with grace and time and patience, I was able to assist you in the best ways that I could. I know that there was some times, some days, I didn't know what to do, you didn't know what to do, we didn't know what to do.

Speaker 2 10:40

We did not know, I mean, because everything was new, everything, I mean being pregnant, you know, and, and being, you know, in the first trim, the sleeping crazy, the, you know just everything just everything and experiencing, I mean even before my brother passed away. We were going to the hospital every day during the week that we were in Virginia. The first week that we were there, we were driving an hour, two hours a day to visit him.

Speaker 2 11:31

An hour there, an hour back, you know, to my sister's house, and that alone, like, is draining. It can be draining when you're there and then you're experiencing the emotions. You're sitting with him, talking, you, you know, hoping that it's not the last conversations, but really relishing in every conversation, making it meaningful, um, and doing that for an entire week straight. It's it can, straight, it can be a lot. So all of that was new. I'm thankful that we were able to share with that. We were able to get there and and be with him, be with family and having to you, having to support me or I don't even want, I don't, I don't know what you want to call it having to, wanting to, willing to, being, being, even being, just being able to support me during that roller coaster time and even the roller coaster afterwards of grieving and celebrating. I'm still doing that. Like you said, we're still in it, even, you know, 10 months later, almost 11 months later, um, it's, it's a challenge, but you have a gift of being able to support in a way that allows people to still be themselves, still experience the emotions that come with losing a person you love, but also being able to celebrate their life Right, because that's what it's really about. Right A long long time ago, when I lost my dad, I had an old teammate who made sure to tell me be sure to celebrate your dad's life.

Speaker 2 13:59

We understand mourning happens and mourning is going to be there and you're grieving that person, but be sure to remember to celebrate their life. And on our birthday, three months later, I celebrated his life by, you know, watching some movies that I knew that he really loved and enjoyed. So and you let me, you know you let me do that. And anytime I had an out, you know, outburst or just a sudden strike of sadness, you allowed that. You allowed me to sit in that and be in that experience, that, and you were there for me to comfort me. And I'm not going to cry on this podcast today, but I really want to thank you because those times do still come up and it's mixed in now with just the hormones of postpartum and experiencing this new life. Um, I think god really knew, I think spirit knew, as one life was transitioning out, another was transitioning in, and it was just most appropriate.

Speaker 1 15:21

So I I thank you I know that was a lot to say, but I I really I'm learning to. I'm learning to actively listen, take compliments and say thank you, not respond with something that pushes it away, but receive it wholeheartedly, that's, you know. That's something else that we'll talk about in later episodes. As men, that we don't know how to take compliments, we won't take compliments for whatever reason. Uh, so I've been working on that and I'm grateful that you can acknowledge that. You know, and you, just being the great woman that you are, I really appreciate it absolutely. Yeah, tough.

Speaker 1 16:18

It's been a tough year for, I think, not just for us but, man, for everybody. Everybody out here has been going through some things and then it seems like the outlets are becoming more and more narrow because, even though we want to express, we also want to be heard and felt, and I think that it's important to that. We have this episode and give you all the updates and continue to work through our emotion because, like I said, 2024 boy. The faster I can put that behind us the better, because, man, it has been heavy, but there has been a lot of light that has come out of it as well, like our daughter, as if we didn't. You know, we got the the 11 year old right, but then we got the new bundle of joy that came out of it and she's an angel.

Speaker 2 17:28

She's an angel. She's an absolute angel. You may hear her from time to time in the podcast. We are not above having her join us. We are not trying to suppress her. We do try to get the pod in while she's napping and sometimes you know that's not always going to be the case for us. You know that's not always going to be the case for us. So in those times where you hear a little whimpering and and baby cooing, she's just joining us and that's all right. I might have to go get her now because I see her on the monitor lifting her head and waking up.

Speaker 2 18:10

But I will say, with this new life, it in our arms every single day, it has transitioned. I know me as a mom a couldn't have imagined and I'm grateful for it. With that, I think, part of the life update of the journey of moving is one thing that I really am excited about. You know we're here in Atlanta and we have family here and we have friends here. You know we have people we love and rock with. But we get to have her, we get to share memories with her as she gets older of you know, her first months in atlanta, and we get to also expand on that as and journey into a new state, new territory that she gets to explore and learn and she may not remember it, but she will definitely have the pictures, she She'll have the video to go back and look at, which I'm excited about, and you know, we get to just experience that newness together and I'm excited about that.

Speaker 1 19:44

Absolutely, absolutely excited Was a little anxiety in the beginning, but, you know, as we've learned to let go of a lot, of, a lot of perfectionism and how we think things are supposed to look, you start to embrace and be grateful for the journey that you want and all the things that have aligned up or have lined up in your favor. Yeah, I am excited you. And just to unpack it a little bit, all the moving that I've been a part of. I've never been the leader, I was always the one helping other people move their houses right, move their things from one place to another. I've learned how to do it by helping and assisting others.

Speaker 1 20:34

So, this being my family and me being the head of household, it's a little different because you know, I have to make sure everything's are taken care of. Um, managing the emotion that comes with, uh, getting rid of some of the things that you know I have a lot of emotion around, or my wife has a lot of emotion around mitigating the schedule because it's just us. We don't have anybody that's watching our newborn Right. So, having to take that workload on and I'm not complaining right now, I'm just giving you, you know, just I'm kind of clearing the space, because I think, as men, we don't really take into consideration what it means to be the head of household in the family. We look at it and we see it and we and we try to mirror the ones that we grew up upon, right, whether it's your dad, your grandfather, uncle. Mirror the ones that we grew up upon, right, whether it's your dad, your grandfather, uncle, an older best friend or older, you know, older sibling, or if you don't have anybody to model. I've learned to make these things my own, and so watching my beautiful family grow and then also uprooting them to put them in a new place, and it's not just like I can go, like how I did before, I can just go and move around and shake and and you know I mean make those decisions at a whim and deal with the consequences, because it's just me, you know, got whole other bodies involved and lives involved.

Speaker 1 22:13

It's been, it's been a lot to shoulder. You know, I have a newfound appreciation for my father, my uncle, you know, and even my older friends and my brother too. Uh, because, unlike other podcasts out there and this is no shots, but I'm about unity, I'm about us working in harmony and showing others like us in our culture younger, older, right Just getting into a relationship relationship, 40 plus years, everywhere in between, more, more or less that we need each other and we can coexist and we can thrive, just like our ancestors did, within love and union, right and working through the tough times together and not chalking it up, because things get tough and I think that's what 2024 has been about for me personally is not looking for exits, but looking for another way to go in deeper right, because I mean if you experienced any of what we've experienced I mean it's stuff that make you want to bail no lie, I mean at least and and if not, completely, bail, it's not like.

Speaker 2 23:44

The thought doesn't come up yeah you know, but that's what makes us the strong unit that we are is like we can acknowledge that. I mean listen, it did not, it was not comfortable and it definitely felt this way, but I'm, I'm here, I'm still here, and not only am I here, I'm present and I'm active, and I want to be here and I choose to be here.

Speaker 1 24:14

Yeah, you know there's a lot of people who don't want to be in relationships and they have really valid reasons and that I can. I can acknowledge that and say yo, that's a really great reason for you and a great truth for you. Really great reason for you and a great truth for you that you don't want to be in a relationship because you know that you can't handle the energy and the time that it takes to build with another person, and I can respect that absolutely I'd rather respect that versus a person who relationship hops or freely gives their body to another person for, you know, short term satisfaction and gratification.

Speaker 1 25:07

So I think that it's important when we are in these relationships that it's important when we are in these relationships and, as you'll see further along in this season, as we touch on these things, that it is important to know your bandwidth.

Speaker 2 25:19

Yeah.

Speaker 1 25:20

Because you're going to be stretched, because relationships that's what it takes. It takes you to be stretched and if you don't have anything to anchor in, right as far as spirit goes, it's going to tear your ass off up man. It's gonna tear your ass up, period. I mean, life would do that in general, but when you navigate through life and you don't have nothing to anchor in and and that's as an individual.

Speaker 2 25:50

As an individual, you need to have be certain that you have a certain bandwidth for whatever it is that you're doing. And again, if you guys hear anything in the background, that's baby girl. She's eating right now, um, but as an individual navigating life, navigating what you are navigating, whatever that is, if it's easy for you right now, if it's if it's a challenge for you right now, you need to know and acknowledge and know your bandwidth. And if you don't know it, you need to get to know what your bandwidth is, to navigate whatever journey path that you are journeying. Because the minute that you are journeying, because the minute that you add anybody else to it whether it's your partner, whether it is a child or children, a bonus child you know whatever, a dog, like a pet. If you cannot be honest with the bandwidth that you have for yourself, you're not going to be honest with the bandwidth that you will be able to have with another body or another situation in your space and in your atmosphere. I think that's probably the biggest thing that you know we've learned over the course of this year is our bandwidth, because we did burn out, know there was some, there were, there were some periods of of of honestly being feeling being burnt out.

Speaker 2 27:28

I remember us earlier in the year working 12 days in a row, 14, 16 days in a row just trying to make it happen and because we had to, and realizing when we actually got a place of respite that we were freaking tired.

Exploring Personal Bandwidth and Growth

Speaker 2 27:54

We had nothing left to give and we still had to give. So we know what that feels like to realize, oh, I've tapped out of my bandwidth and also realize, oh snap, I still have to do fill in the blank thing. So to anybody anybody listening, if you're feeling burnt out, acknowledge, before this year is over, what do we have? Five, five weeks, four weeks before the the year is over. Now you better take some time and acknowledge your bandwidth. You're going into a brand new 365 days. Acknowledge the bandwidth that you have, whatever that is, and then put in place a plan for yourself for whatever goals that you have this year, whatever relationships you want to cultivate. You have this year, whatever relationships you want to cultivate. Put that in writing for yourself so you know how to tackle it as this year ends and you go into a brand new year. We we acknowledge happy new year, but you know we really celebrate our new year as spring approaches.

Speaker 1 29:21

Yeah, in alignment with with nature right you know.

Speaker 1 29:24

But yeah, nah, like I think that's a good title for this episode too. Well, you had mentioned the bandwidth. You had said something that was pretty dope before I had had got up. Um started, it was something bandwidth. But yeah, checking your bandwidth, seeing what you really can handle, being honest with yourself, so that way, when you go into the new year whichever new year you uh honor.

Speaker 1 29:54

Like my wife just said, we honor that our new year falls in the spring. This is the dead season that we're going into, which is the season to plant the seeds, because we know in the spring is when things come back alive, which means your manifestations breathe more life and come from that realm into this realm, whichever one you prefer. Not my problem, and I'm not even challenging you, challenging you on it. I'm saying that you need to have an honest conversation with yourself and check what your bandwidth really is going into, whichever new year you consider a new year to be, because I just want the best for you, period. So it's less about which new year you honor and more about how are you honoring yourself by being real and truthful with what you can and can't handle.

Speaker 1 30:56

If something is a lot for you, it's okay to say that it's a lot, but if something is a lot for you, it's okay to say that it's a lot, right If you are choosing to still stick with it, even though it is a lot, say it out loud, tell another, tell a neighbor or something, so that way you can take the accountability and let them know you're not looking for sympathy, no-transcript things. Out with you too, and whichever belief system that you have, because when you start getting outside opinions, those opinions can overshadow yours or undermine yours. And so I'm touching on that because I know a lot of us out here. We are looking for answers outside of ourselves, and usually, if you can get still for a while, you can find the answer that you need. It's really if you believe that you can apply it and make it work. Sometimes, the answer that we find in ourselves isn't the one that we really want, and we don't want to acknowledge it because we say, oh, that can't be right, because it goes against what we think we want. But it always give you what you need, hence why a lot of us get burnt out.

Speaker 1 32:45

That was one of the reasons why we got burnt out to giving to something that we thought was supposed to be our livelihood. And you know, on this chase for and, we got burnt out. I know me as a man. I got burnt out and I've never been able to sit there and tell anyone babe, yo, I am burnt out, I'm done. I'm tired hearing that as the call for yo give me time, as the call for yo, give me time. Yo, I'm here with you, but I need time. I'm doing things for us, but I need time.

Speaker 1 33:34

These are the types of conversations that are needed in order to see where your bandwidth is running low, so you can be the most productive, you, that you can be the most giving you that you can, and you're not pouring from an empty cup, like me and my wife have done for not only each other, but for others throughout our entire life. So, just like now, we're coming back to this podcast, recentered and recharged, and taking it a lot more serious, because there are, uh, business benefits to having a creative job like this and this is a career path, right, you know, and I can acknowledge that this is something that I wasn't taking seriously enough, and I'm looking at many people who I don't know and who I do, who are benefiting from being consistent, even as we find our voice and we find our topics and we find the ways to connect deeper with you all. It can still be done in a way that is fun, that is exciting, eye-opening, right and, at the end of the day, still nourishes that part of us that quenches knowledge, that is thirsty for knowledge and wants to, uh, make it applicable not only for us but for anyone who listens. So it's about figuring out the bandwidth. What's your bandwidth?

Speaker 2 35:18

what's your bandwidth?

Speaker 1 35:20

what it is y'all. What's your bandwidth? Be where you at with it. You're being stretched. Good, you probably ain't stretched in five years. You probably ain't stretched in five years.

Speaker 2 35:34

You need that joint stretched out we're gonna, when we publish this, we're gonna go into our stories on ig. Uh, what's the handle on ig? Is it? Can I talk my shift pod?

Speaker 1 35:46

no, I just cannot talk my shift can I talk my shift?

Speaker 2 35:49

and you know, we're gonna ask you know what's your bandwidth? And we want, we want to know, we want to know what. What is it that you are you not stretching yourself to fit in your life? Or what is it that you haven't stretched yourself, that you need to stretch yourself? Be on the lookout for that and, you know, take with you, if you will this, the little nugget that says, hey, you need to stretch yourself more, check your, check your bandwidth. Do you need to stretch yourself more or do you need to relax? Do you need to put some things down? You know, make sure that you're asking yourself those questions, because, either way, there's something that you are that that is needed in your life, whether you need to stretch to get it or whether you need to relax to get it man and that's another thing that we're gonna learn about, too letting go and learning to recharge yourself, not by doing, but by resting, literally, literally resting, yo, like I know, as a man I was like what, what do you mean?

Speaker 1 37:08

like I can just chill and I can still attract what I need? See, that word gets thrown around and I know it's like a trigger word now manifestation, attracting, the law of attraction and all of that shit. But I'm here to tell you that a lot of that stuff comes from the original teachings and what. Like I said, we're gonna get into a lot of that this year or next year, but in this season of, can I talk my shift? So be on the lookout, be on the lookout for it, be on the lookout for this lovely family oh yeah, because there's a lot coming in 2025.

Speaker 2 37:52

You know we're gonna, we're gonna take you on the journey and hopefully we can inspire you to do some things that you have been wanting to do and haven't been able to, or say some things that you've been wanting to say and haven't.

Speaker 1 38:07

Yeah, and not only will you find us in between your ears with every episode, but you can find us on YouTube, you can find us on Instagram. Can I talk my shift, the lg underscore and sandwalker inspo? That is our handles, that is the three handles for this podcast and its host. Be on the lookout for interviews, because not only will it be my wife and I sharing our experiences, but we also want to give a platform for anybody else, for interesting people of the culture who want to come up here and have a change of heart at some point in time in life, who just want to share their experiences and their shifts. And yeah, of course we're going to drop great books on you but, like we said, this is just an update episode and we're getting warm back up. You know, it's like when you come off the off the IR and you can't just hop back in and run a race Right, or or get back in the game and drop 20, or be a quarterback and get right back in and have the greatest game of your life. Have the greatest game of your life. Though that happens, we're taking the small steps because we want to be able to make sure that we're providing you the best of the best and we're moving from a centered place, a confident place. You know I'm saying so.

Speaker 1 39:32

Yeah, episode one of season three. What your bandwidth be like? Dlg sam walker inspo. What your bandwidth be like? Dlg Sam Walker Inspo. Lil Boop, who's co-hosting? Obviously she wanna co-host now and yeah, stay tuned. Find us on every single DSP where podcasts are streamed, especially Apple Music. Make sure you rate the podcast, that way people who are interested in the same things you are can easily find us. And also what else we say Download your favorite episodes. Download your favorite episodes.

Speaker 2 40:18

Subscribe to the show. Download your favorite episodes. Download your favorite episodes Subscribe to the show. Download your favorite episodes. Rate and review us Five stars so that you know, so that the platforms know To keep pushing out this type of content To you.

Speaker 1 40:29

For sure, for sure, till next time y'all, can I Talk my Shift, season 3, episode 1. You have just heard it, witnessed it, felt it and share it. Share it on your platform, share it with a, with a loved one, share it with a friend, share it with a co-worker someone who needs it, because this family is rooted in unity and the shifts that we're making in our life. We want to find like-minded individuals who are doing the same, and let's build community the right way. Community does not mean uniformity. Shout out to RZA Islam. I'm sure that's where I heard it from.

Speaker 1 41:14

I believe that's where I heard that from. Community is not uniformity and I felt that in my soul we don't have to be alike in every single shape, way and form, but our intentions need to be aligned. If our intentions are alike then we can have a community. And until the next time I hope I can leave you with that.

Speaker 2 41:32

Thanks so much. I love you love.

Speaker 1 41:34

For sure, I love you too. I love you for listening, appreciate you and till next time, y'all.